The Art of Self-Love

It’s February, the month of love, time to express your love to others.

How about doing it differently this year? Consider giving a little love to yourself, yes You! Believe it or not, you are the most important person in the world. What would those that rely on you, do without you? Let’s take a peak at what the Art of Self-Love may look like. You never know it may change your life and those around you.

Taking time to love self, conjures up many images for different people. Pause a moment and ask yourself what Self- Love means to you…

Hear the voices, isn’t it selfish, I don’t deserve it, I don’t have time for me or that stuff. Do I really have to look in the mirror and say nice things to myself and many other voices. What’s yours? Self love is more than just doing external things for oneself goes deeper than that, it is an internal process.

Self-Love is defined as “regard for one’s own wellbeing and happiness.”
It’s about taking time to love, honour, respect your needs and value yourself for who you are, just as you are.
You are enough, as is.


In my practice, I am constantly reminded how hard people are on themselves. The constant voices that evoke guilt, shame, belittling is a daily barrage, which becomes part of our being. Where does it come from? Most times when we explore in the sessions, we find that it is mainly voices from the past, our parents, well meaning friends, family, teachers, lecturers. We take these on, amplify them and start berating ourselves. The core of the issue is that we have forgotten to love and to be kind to ourselves.

Learning the Art of Self-Love

How do we remedy this? By learning the art of self-love. This, like any art takes time, patience and gentleness. If done kindly, consistently and with some commitment, it can make the world of difference to you and those around you. It’s all about developing a loving relationship with yourself. It’s a dance of sorts, as in any relationship. First to get to know yourself again and then DO something different, to grow the loving relationship. If you find this difficult, imagine giving love to someone or something special (like an animal). Feel that warm, fuzzy feeling and now give a bit to yourself. A self hug would also be welcome!

Taking Action

“Self-love requires you to be honest about your current choices and thought patterns and undertake new practices that reflect self-worth.”

Caroline Kirk
  1. Awareness: Bring awareness to how you are loving self.
    • Physically: what are you eating / drinking daily (the alcohol too), how are you breathing, moving, sleeping ?
    • Mentally: how are you communicating with yourself?
    • Emotionally: how are you feeling and what do you do with those feelings?
    • Spiritually: how are you feeding your soul to bring joy and space into your life.
  2. Acknowledgement: once you have gone through the above steps you are halfway there. The next step is to embrace everything, just as it is for now. The positive and the negative without judgement. This acknowledgment is indicating to yourself that you are noticing, which in itself, has the capacity to shift. Know that nothing is set in stone and all things are possible. From this position you can take the next step..
  3. Make a choice: to change what is not working for you. Remember to do this with kindness, gentleness, empathy and compassion. Add a bit of gratitude in for good measure. Then remember, it need not all happen at once. You can take baby steps. The important part of this is to take ACTION and DO something different. Nothing will change unless you take those steps to nurture, nourish and honour yourself with Love.

Remember you are a precious being, that deserves love just as others do too. May your cup be filled with love for yourself then others.

Love to you all.
Moira ♥

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